Bisexual threesome: DIY Threesomes



Is there anyone out there who hasn’t fantasized about a threesome? Anyone at all? Didn’t think so. It’s the most popular sexual fantasy out there, and for good reason. Sex is great, and adding another person to the fun is like pouring hot sauce on your food. More flavor in every bite. As bisexuals, we experience sex with men and women, so what better way is there to revel in your bisexuality than in a roll in the hay with one of each?

When we dream about our ultimate sexual experience, we picture an ebb and flow, a give and take; an easy, graceful act with seamless transitions from one position to the next. All we have to do is gaze into the other person’s eyes, and we’ll know exactly what to do. Having sex is easy, right? Think again. If you think sexual maneuvering between two people can be complicated, adding a third person into the mix can be downright difficult. You’ve got some planning to do. Not only do you have to wonder who to include in your sex play, but now the question is How?

Many threesomes start out with a couple looking for a third person. In the straight world, it’s often two women and one man, as many het guys are uncomfortable with another erection in the room. Luckily, as bisexuals, we’ve got a whole world of choice just waiting for us. Will it be two guys and a gal? Will it be a homogeneous group? Who will be doing whom? Consider the guidelines outlined below and you’ll be well on your way to a pile of fun.

COMMUNICATE: It’s not the most exciting instruction ever, but it’s essential to having a sexual encounter that’s satisfying for everyone involved, and can prevent uncomfortable moments after fulfilling the passion. It doesn’t matter when you talk about these things, but be sure to cover all the bases. Talking about your desires, expectations and potential triggers is vital to making sure that no one’s feelings are hurt, that you have a safe and healthy time, and, above all, talking about it increases your chances of getting to do it again!

If you’re a couple searching for a third person, you have to be very aware of power dynamics. Couples are used to one another, and are aware of what pleases the other person. Bringing a third person into your bed can be intimidating for the newbie in the group.You’ve probably got all kinds of silent communication that the third person won’t be aware of, routines that you follow or body language that expresses arousal or discomfort and this can tip the power balance in your favor. Encounters between three single people can be less complicated, emotionally, but still require each participant to disclose vital information about themselves.

Things to discuss before you take off your clothes:

  1. Exactly what will be involved? Who is comfortable doing what, and to whom? What are your turn ons and turn offs? Do you love giving head? Do you hate having your anus touched? Are you comfortable being spanked? Sex means lots of things to many different people, don’t make assumptions about what people consider to be sex acts, or about what they’re willing to do. Who will be penetrated, if anyone? Will there be toys? Will you be at someone’s home, or will you choose the more anonymous hotel room?
  2. What kinds of safety measures will be taken? Will you have code words, similar to engaging in S/M play? Will friends know where you are?
  3. Safe sex is important here. Remember that condoms need to be changed every time the partner changes. This goes for toys and penises. Will you use dental dams? Who’s bringing the lube? Even couples who are fluid-bonded (those who no longer use barrier methods of protection) need to use condoms, gloves or dams with a new partner. It’s best to be prepared for these things. Nothing is less sexy than having to run out to the drugstore in the middle of things.

GET GOING
Okay, all the talking is over, and the fun can begin. But now you’re sitting around looking at one another like dorks. What should you do to kick things off? The same thing you would do with any other partner: watch some porn, give each other massages, have a pillow fight, hang out in a hot tub, talk dirty to one another, whatever you want. Just pick something that you all agree is sexy.

Threesomes can involve some serious gymnastics, if you like, or they can be pretty meat and potatoes. With a variety of breasts, hips, butts, cocks and mouths it can be difficult to decide where to start. Here are some suggestions:

The Voyeur: One person refrains entirely from sexual activity and just watches. They might make comments or masturbate, but they don’t actually touch the other two people involved. This can be a great way to integrate a third person into your play without the emotional complications of physical contact. It’s also a good way to test yourself to see if you’re committed to a triad. The voyeur can also take a leadership role, telling the other two people what to do. Don’t think that the person who is watching is missing out on the fun. It’s like directing your own porno flick, only better.

Tag Team: One person can lay, sit, or stand and the other two participants can do whatever they like. It works nicely if you divide the receiving partner in half, with one person taking the chest, head and torso, and the third person taking the legs, feet and groin. This is a great way to start a threesome, and is particularly fun when everyone takes turns being satisfied by two people at once. Lick, suck, stroke, caress, or nibble on whatever shows up in your vicinity. Two mouths on one body can produce an awful lot of pleasure; this can make for some pretty mind blowing orgasms. What could be more enjoyable than having two people fulfill your every erotic wish, at once? Just lie back and relax…if you can!

Two People on Top: A guy, or girl with a strap-on lays face up with one person straddling their hips and the other person sits astride their face. The two people on top can face each other and kiss or fondle each other. Another possibility is that they both face the same way, which can allow for penetration with toys or fingers or anal play. The person on the bottom is going down on one person, and penetrating another. The top two players are both getting off at once. One small warning: The person who is giving head and fucking the second person may not provide the best oral sex ever. They may be a little distracted. Having a vibrator on hand can fix that problem.

Doggy Style: This is a favorite of many seasoned swingers. One person, A, lays on their back and a second person, B, crouches between their legs. Person B can go down on person A, while Person C can play with person B doggy style. Again, we’ve got the combination of oral sex and penetration, or finger fucking. As a bonus, doggy style is also the best position to hit someone’s g-spot. This is a great way for two girls and a guy to all get involved at the same time. It also works well for three girls and a strap-on. It’s also a possibility for three guys at once, if the middle person is into anal penetration. For any group of three, it’s a great way for the middle person to get spanked.

Doggy Style Variations: One Person lays down, and is straddled by another person who is facing forward. The person facing forward can provide oral sex or a hand job to another person standing in front of them. While this sounds complicated and technical, it’s pretty simple to execute. Another possibility is for one person to sit on the first person’s lap and to pleasure the third person who is standing in front of them. This works best if the person standing is a guy. A technical point: it’s easier to give head to a guy who is standing than it is to effectively eat pussy from this angle.

Oral Sex Triangle: This one is pretty self-explanatory. It’s like that team building game you can play where each person lays with their head on another person’s stomach and tries not to laugh. Except for the Triangle we’re talking about you lay face down in someone’s crotch, instead of face up. It’s like a sixty-nine, only for three people, not two.


If you’re looking for more inspiration, watch some good porn, peruse the Kama Sutra, or make a visit to your local sex store. Or you could just lay in a big naked heap and see what happens. If you foresee lots of threesomes in your future, you may want to invest in a sling or swing, or if you have a very private backyard, a hammock. Having someone suspended in mid-air gives easy access for two people to genitals and chests and mouths. It takes a lot of the acrobatics out of fitting three people on a bed or couch. Above all, use your imagination. If it feels good, repeat it! If you’re lucky, the combined erotic imagination of several people will create all kinds of new experiences for you.

Before you set off on a world of adventure, there’s just one last word about communication. Don’t forget to debrief afterwards. Having sex with more than one person at once can be an emotionally powerful experience. Be sure to check in with your playmates to make sure that everyone feels secure and happy afterward. You can do it in the shower right after, over email the next day or on the telephone. Let everyone know you appreciated their openness and are committed to their happiness. If someone has just fulfilled a lifelong erotic fantasy of yours, it’s only polite to say thank you.